Tagalog Funny Jokes Text Messages 3

Dir tatay,padalhan mo ko pera kc ang aking
damit oinunit ng daga.Anak,wla akong pera,pero
meron akong pusa! nagmmhal,ITAY.

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An alcoholic son wrote a lettr: BEER dad,
GIN na ako iinom ulit,WHISKY kelan.
TANDUAY mo yan,tiTEQUILAN ko na!
pRHUMis po! Your SAN,MIGUEL.

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My prayer: Dear God,thank u 4 mking me healthy.
can u pls mke me also sexy? if u cant
make me sexy,pls make all my friends fat!

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Isang mgandang araw pra sa isng cute na ka2lad mo.
Isang mgandang pagbati galing sa mas cute sayo! ako yon! hehehehhe

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Ingat ka plagi balita ko hinuhuli and mga
cute na ngayon at saka...HUH! teka...san nyo ko
dadalhin? May kausap ak...sndli..ano ba! teka! help!

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Sterwardess: Sir,chewing gum po pra di
sumakit ang tenga nyo during d flight.
Psahero: Tenk u! (aftr 1 hr);
Psahero: Ms,pano ba tanggalin tong chewing gum sa tenga ko?

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A lawyer was questioning a female witness:
"how old r u maam?" long pause nused.
"Dnt hesitate my dear,d longer u wait,d older u bcome"

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Marunong ka kontng Algebra? cg, sagutin
mo nga to: I+1/2 of square +0+1/2 of X+E+
3/4 of X+0+U. ano sagot mo?
Sagot: I LOVE U

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Which is correct: d yolk s white or d yolk are
white? Bilis,answer dayon!
Answer: D yolk is yellow.

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Its d beginning of eternity and d end of time
and space, and d beginning and d end of evryone..
ano answer mo?

Answer: E

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Twice in a moment,once a month,
nver in a year...wat is it?

Answer: M

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Wat headlines do women notice?...
WRINKLES!

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Intsik: Taxee! Makano punta
Makati?
Taxi: Ikw lng isa?
Intsik: Pano ako dating don?
bkit ikw d sama?

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Class,let's conjugate d word LANGOY.
Pedro: Ang bata ay naglangoy, ang bata
ay naglalangoy,ang bata ay lumangoy,
Lumalangoy.Ang bata ay LUMOS!

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Teacher: Use DEDUCT,DEFENCE,DEFEAT
DETAIL in a sentence.
Student: De Duct jumped over De Fence,
De Feat first den De tail!

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Titser: Use puera in a sentence.
Student: Ako mam! Ang gwapo at bait ni sir!
Titser: Asan ang "puera" doon?
Student: Puera Gaba!

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May s2ry ako sayo: My friend,as a boy,went
2 skul evryday w/ his dog..bt later dey had 2 go to sparate..
my friend wnt 2 skul alon.. Y? coz his dog graduated!

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